Smash Hits April 1997

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STEP 1: DON'T SING IN THE SCHOOL CHOIR
My mum thought I'd either be a priest or a pop star, and I was never gonna be a priest, really. At school I was a bit of a joker
- I was popular with the girls, but mainly because I made them laugh. Most of the lads hated my guts. I always wanted to do
music at school, but not in an academic way. I was never the sort of person who'd sing in the school choir.

STEP 2: BE NICE TO YOUR NAN
My dad was playing Elvis records around the house, so music was a big part of our family. When I was about twelve, my mum
got me a keyboard for my birthday and I just started playing. Every Saturday all the family would go round to me Nana's - she
used to live in sheltered housing and I'd sit and entertain all the old bids by playing Roll Out The Barrel.

STEP 3: JIGGLE YOUR CHICKEN NUGGETS
I really, really liked this girl who I went to school with, and I was supposed to go to college with her. But something made me
decide not to go. I spent a while working in McDonald's and I thought there was no way I could do something like that. I
thought, "Oh, God, what can i do?", so I decided to send this tape I'd made to Nigel Martin-Smith (Take That's Manager). It
was me singing two Stevie Wonder songs, just messing about at home. Two days later I came back from McDonald's and my
mum said "Oh, this bloke Nigel's phoned." I went down to see him and he took me on as a tea boy.

STEP 4: MAKE TEA THAT TASTES LIKE DONKEY WEE
The idea was that I'd spend six months working in the office and getting to know the industry before I was launched. I wasn't
so much the tea boy coming in with a tray every day, I was more like the office skivvy. I'd be in the office at ten every day, I
was paid £100 a week out of my advances - it was great! I'd have to buy the butties for everyone - and if I didn't have enough
cash for a sandwich of my own I'd pinch a bit of ham out of someone else's. I'd always short-change the staff as well! And to
be honest I made crap tea. They always used to say it tasted like donkey wee.

STEP 5: GET EMBARASSED BY YOUR MUM
Are my mum and dad showbiz? are they 'eck - they're like Jack and Vera Duckworth. My mam's got this big, fuzzy white hair,
she's known as Our Rita. She reads the tea-leaves around Moston and when this all started it was so embarassing. She went
around telling everyone at Bingo all about her son who was going to be a star. They were like, "Oh yeah, Our Rita."

STEP 6: GET YOUR FIRST SINGLE WRITTEN BY TAKE THAT'S HOWARD
I'm a great believer in fate, that everything has a reason. Crazy Chance got me a lot of press and stuff. (Sighs) I was eager to
release my own stuff but I couldn't beacuse it was like, Howard's offered this song, it's a great opportunity to be launched. I
just went along with it. It'll be on the album. It's the first track, so by the time you get to thev end of the album it'll be right away.
You'll have forgotten about it.

STEP 7: ACT LIKE JIMMY TARBUCK (!?!)
My worst gig was an under-18's club in Stafford, just before Crazy Chance had come out. It was the week of the exams and it
was murder. There was just me on stage and these twelve girls at the front of the stage just looking at me, going "Oh, right."
After I finished they didn't even clap, and all the way through they were talking to each other and drinking their White Lighning
(horrid cider). I was going "Hey! What's your name?!" I felt like Jimmy Tarbuck. It was just horrible, but it's gigs like that that
make you appreciate the good ones.

STEP 8: CHAT UP THE SPICE GIRLS
I've done loads of roadshows where people don't come over and talk. You imagine it to be parties all the time, and it doesn't
really happen like that unless you make friends. Now me and Boyzone are good mates, and I have a right laugh with 911 -
they're top lads, just dead normal. Spice Girls as well - I met them just before Wannabe came out. They were quite nervous -
they were going, "God, it's our first single and we don't know whether it's gonna be a hit." Then the next week it went in at
number three! When I saw them at the Brits it was great - we were hugging and saying "Awww, I haven't seen you for ages!"

STEP 9: GET PINNED TO THE WALL BY A WILD ITALIAN
The fans do all sorts, especially in Italy. I came off stage there once and there were all these girls dressed in black. This girl said
(does a sweet Italian accent) "Please may I kiss you?" and I said, "Oh, alright then." The next thing I knew she'd pinned me to
the wall, with her tongue down my throat! I thought she just wanted a peck on the cheek! Would I go out with a fan? Why not!
If they were just normal I would. I like girls who make me laugh, who are genuine and honest. And I like them to stick their
tongue down my throat the first time they meet me! I like them to be forward!

STEP 10: HAVE A GINAGGEROUS GREAT HIT!
When I Can Make You Feel Good got in the top ten I couldn't believe it - it was great. I didn't have any champagne though -
just some cheapo plonk that my man had won at Bingo. The other night, though, I met Mica Paris (soul singer of yesteryear) -
she was a huge influence on me, and I got her number! Then I met Elton John. It's times like that when it really sinks in. That's
when you appreciate it.